Discussions

I have a friend who broke up with a partner of many years and long story short, it was very messy and abusive and the ex-partner is not allowing my friend to go to their old place they shared together and pack their things for themselves. The ex wants to do it for her and isn’t even allowing her to go inside, so there’s no guarantee she will even get everything back. He has also been trying to negotiate to keep some things but my friend absolutely does not want to leave a single item there, which brings us back to there being no guarantee she will get everything back if she is not allowed in. Her things have been pretty much held hostage since January as they have been in contact this whole time, going back and forth about moving her stuff. It might be worth nothing that they are both pretty young as well (22) so my friend is unsure about her options. I’m wondering if anything can be done about this or if anyone has been in a similar situation that has any advice?

Contact the police and see if someone will give her an escort, or if someone else can go in her place if she is unwilling. Other than that, I am not sure what other options are out there.

Tell your friend to hire a lawyer! If she can’t afford one, there are legal aid lawyers she can apply for. Just google.

Definitely try the police and contact victim services.

Check with the YWCA they serve lots of people who deal with the same sort of issues. They will be able to advise on options. Note they also do counseling for partners who are abused (physical, mental & physiological abuses). Please note they will help men and women victims of abuse. Good luck!