Discussions

I sent u a pm

Trying to find Decent Woman, they are hard to find in Brandon!

crosslock said "Right now in our culture there is a war on men and masculinity. Men are shamed for being aggressive, bossy, forward, etc. It started in the schools and now it has trickled into our society. Just look at some of garbage posts on here saying that even if you think a guy is nice he probably isn't. Can you imagine if a guy put this predjuduce and labels on women? They would be completely shamed. The feminist teachers have told the boys they should be ashamed of their instincts and their opinions don't matter. It's the same reason trump won the election. People are tired of being told what is acceptable to think and do and are tired if never being listened to.     What do you think men are going to do if they are continually told they are nothing but dogs that need to be tamed by women? They just shut down and keep to themselves and never engage women unless they want tail. Being chivalrous and aggressive used to be praised, now women don't like what they have cultivated because they think all the men out there are either whipped or a man slut. You got your whimpy men and now you decided that you don't want that, you actually want the caveman waving the torch outside the cave protecting you. Now you're just whining that you can't have both. "

feminism in the classic sense means equal, not bad men nor bad women and honestly thats all i want men to treat me like, like a equal human that has likes and dislikes, skills and flaws not because im a "woman" because im a human individual, and in return I will treat them the same, like an individual not just a "man" plus what I have seen of chivalrous men they were not bossy and aggressive they were polite and dignified and there is nothing wrong with that, they can say their opinions as i should mine and we both should respect each others if they are as you say "men" should be who would want that? who would want a aggressive bossy person? so imo im not upset at all that teachers and society has said no we dont accept that behavior, it never made wimpy men when being polite was chivalrous nor does it now, it make respectful humans  
 
im not sure what the op values in a man but i value a guy who treats me as well as I treat him, lucky for me I found him

Sent you a PM :-)

Okay sad to say I have no idea how to start a PM. Lol. But I do respond. Female mid 40's.

isn't always a bad thing as some treat it to be. You learn a lot about yourself and what truly matters to you in a mate and in life. Everyone wants to find that decent partner of course, sometimes it just takes longer than others to connect with someone. One also must look at the venues they are meeting people at as sometimes that is an issue, or maybe people are just shy and it is harder to meet someone. And yes joining clubs, volunteering, getting yourself out there are great ways to start, it just may not happen quickly. I'm mid 30s and have been single for quite awhile now and yes at times it feels like that "decent guy" won't come along, however always remain positive and when you least expect it is when it will happen or so they say...lol. Good luck to everyone in their search

Date/marry your best friend! It's like a forever sleepover with your best friend AND you get to have sex with them!

so many rules I stopped dating years ago  
 
vehicle I drove (Jeep) proves I hate women, ended two dates when I parked.  
Open a door and you are anti women's lib  
Don't open the door for them and you are a four letter word.  
Invite them for supper and pay, that is end of world stuff. You are supposed to ask permission to pay or give them a chance too pay half.  
Ask if they want to share the cost and you are to cheap and a money scrooge (or something to that effect).  
 
Funniest one was a women made a big scene yelling so everyone in the restaurant new she was not happy about my looking at the bill. She leaves and makes a bigger scene while paying, poor cashier didn't know what to do.  
When I finally left the cashier asked about the bill that I had actually paid before the date arrived told her to keep it as a tip for putting up with the show. Really made her night

Ya some people are just crazy.

I'm a big time people watcher, and tend to notice when some folks are getting ahead of themselves. I don't tend to make the first move either, until I'm sure the woman has some invested interest in me. Too many times, a nice friend I've made has put some distance between themselves and me for having expressed some interest to get a little closer.  
So, I usually end up having women coming onto me. When it happens. Or, the sparks really fly between the two of us. Since I like to talk about consent. And taking things to the next step, unlike some people. Who just go ahead and take those bounds.  
I fully believe consent is sexy as hell. Talking about kissing, before we make that first exchange. That's the stuff that makes my heart glow.  
But, it doesn't seem like women in this province are open to discussing this anywhere near as much as out west.  
Then, maybe I'm just out of line!  
 
early 30's man here

I sent u a pm!

I have a real creative side to me. Love music and will be coming up a little older next month. Would love to go sit have a drink, visit with all people who are single a group and start hanging out. Any age just to start meeting.

Been single for over 2 years.  
Not really trying to meet someone. But looking  
Sometimes its nice to be single, but most of the time it sucks.  
Makes more time with friends and family.  
But yes I do miss those moments of having somebody.  
Single, Male, 37  
Well 38 tomorrow

I agree with those who say you can''t force a good relationship to happen. It takes work. The first part is finding the right person who is willing to work with you, someone who has similar life values and goals. You will still run into rough spots but you work those out hopefully most of the time.  
 
Finding the ''decent'' man or woman, is totally subjective. It is different for each one of us. But in order to really know who that is we need to know ourselves. I think so many relationships fail because of lack of maturity, lack of understanding of life goals and then when we do grow up in the relationship its not what we want. My point is don''t rush. Work on getting to know yourself, learn to work with people, be a good person, know what you want in life. Somewhere along the way there may or may not be someone to share that with.  
 
The grass is not always greener on the other side. Its where you feed it.  
 
Happy Birthday MrD! Have an wonderful day!!  
 
Edited by Spades!!, 2016-11-16 07:20:46

it is just as hard to meet woman...you meet someone that may peak your interest, but if you approach them they may reject you then you have lost a friend. If you are nice to them they just want to keep you for a friend...they would rather go after the forbidden fruit so to speak...I see it all the time...someday someone will recognize what I have to offer...and they will have a man for life...and a great life with a loving caring man... until then I just continue to be myself... I will not change just to "get lucky"

I’ve been reading these types of discussions for a while now, having never responded. I often wonder if the “good” men are intimidated by strong, successful women? I think I am fairly normal; 36 years old, I have a good career, I own my own home, and I can manage most of life on my own. Why can’t we find “the one”? Maybe we are too ambitious or have too many pre-requisites. I know there is no Mr. Perfect, but there has to be someone close out there?  
If you are someone who has some ambition in life and knows where you are going, and aren’t intimidated by a woman with her head on her shoulders, send me a message!  
 
Happy Birthday to MrD – November 17th is a good day for birthdays, it’s also my birthday!

I sent u a pm!

TC1979 said "I’ve been reading these types of discussions for a while now, having never responded. I often wonder if the “good” men are intimidated by strong, successful women? I think I am fairly normal; 36 years old, I have a good career, I own my own home, and I can manage most of life on my own. Why can’t we find “the one”? Maybe we are too ambitious or have too many pre-requisites. I know there is no Mr. Perfect, but there has to be someone close out there?   If you are someone who has some ambition in life and knows where you are going, and aren’t intimidated by a woman with her head on her shoulders, send me a message!     Happy Birthday to MrD – November 17th is a good day for birthdays, it’s also my birthday! "

This is the thing that kills most opportunities. I was dating a woman who I thought things were going great with, then out of the blue this "list" came up and she began questioning if we should stay together..... that pretty much killed it for me as I was not sure where we were at or where we were going. She stopped inviting me over and when I tried to get her to go out she had already "made plans" with someone else. Despite the fact we had a good relationship that list changed everything.  
 
I realize there are characteristics a person must have in order has to draw attract another to them but the superficial ones kill me - must have white teeth, must not wear jeans and T-shirt, must not have facial hair, must be taller than me, lol. I have seen these listed on POF as deal breakers... too funny.  
 
Edited by Cee Jay 55, 2016-11-16 12:36:36

V-BallRocks said "Date/marry your best friend! It's like a forever sleepover with your best friend AND you get to have sex with them! "

You have to meet your best friend first - and most guys get "friend-zoned" once they become friends with a woman... so it's a fine line there, lol.

It is really hard to be friends first inhave found. Not saying its a bad thing and it works for some people.. but i have had no luck with that...

I took a chance and told her how I felt! Best decision I ever made! We've been together five years now! Good luck in your search!

For myself I unluckily have have the friend zone horse shoe ties to me. Don't get me wrong I love my friends but when all have boyfriends or girlfriends and I'm stuck as the third wheel it dose suck. I would just want someone else who share common interests and we can enjoy each other's company....ok I'm done venting! Lol

For both men and woman.  
 
I have been single for a while now. I have taken time to find out who I am, what I want and need in a future partner. I haven't and won't make a list. I have tried on-line dating, I work, volunteer, keep busy going to the gym and going out with friends but still Mr. Wonderful is no where to be found.  
 
The older we get the harder it seems to be to meet someone. We get set in our ways and don't want to compromise to meet someone.  
 
Life is meant to be shared. Good luck everyone!

MREJ said "Just as difficult.   We rarely cross paths and when I do, they are almost always married, engaged or partnered.   If you think towns and cities are difficult,   try out in the rural area's.   Almost impossible but I ain't giving up.   Ps. Late 40's male. "

Female, early 50's  
 
I am not giving up either. Good luck.

Lookandlearn said "Okay sad to say I have no idea how to start a PM. Lol. But I do respond. Female mid 40's. "

Thanks, I sent you a pm.

Eyebiter said "it is just as hard to meet woman...you meet someone that may peak your interest, but if you approach them they may reject you then you have lost a friend. If you are nice to them they just want to keep you for a friend...they would rather go after the forbidden fruit so to speak...I see it all the time...someday someone will recognize what I have to offer...and they will have a man for life...and a great life with a loving caring man... until then I just continue to be myself... I will not change just to "get lucky" "

We shouldn't have to change to be with someone and certainly not to just "get lucky".

I am a male, 39, and not giving up. I consider myself a decent guy and know the right woman is out there somewhere. My dilemma is I am divorced so that turns women away.

it's hard enough meeting a decent guy let alone in a small town. This early forties farm girl hears you loud and clear.

There are lots of great guys out there. As I'm sure there are many great women out there too. The same holds true that there are some pretty selfish, mean, superficial and emotionally unstable folks too. It's probably tough to find a connection, especially if you have an actual huge list of criteria that is mostly full of superficial "fluff". Perhaps if we looked more at the core values a person has, the attitude in which they meet adversity, their ability to give of themselves, to accept love and love back in return, it might be easier to find a partner. Leave the "list" at home, and try seeing a person's true character. I've met many women who I thought were stunningly attractive until I got to know them. After realizing how manipulative and toxic they were, suddenly there was no attraction whatsoever. (Acquaintances, co-workers, dates, girlfriends). I find it easy to become more and more attracted to someone who has a soft beautiful heart, a vibrant soul, a boat load of kindness and a stable head on their shoulders. Whether the CEO of their own huge company or a stay at home mom, (both jobs are tough as hell)- socio-economic status does not matter to me. WHO you are and how you treat others is important, not what you do for a living. Have patience- I know it sucks. Some great guys out there are doing their best to prioritize family obligations (if they are single with kids/dependants), careers and helping others and are not in the dating scene yet. The good ones are worth the wait...

gearhead52 said "There are lots of great guys out there. As I'm sure there are many great women out there too. The same holds true that there are some pretty selfish, mean, superficial and emotionally unstable folks too. It's probably tough to find a connection, especially if you have an actual huge list of criteria that is mostly full of superficial "fluff". Perhaps if we looked more at the core values a person has, the attitude in which they meet adversity, their ability to give of themselves, to accept love and love back in return, it might be easier to find a partner. Leave the "list" at home, and try seeing a person's true character. I've met many women who I thought were stunningly attractive until I got to know them. After realizing how manipulative and toxic they were, suddenly there was no attraction whatsoever. (Acquaintances, co-workers, dates, girlfriends). I find it easy to become more and more attracted to someone who has a soft beautiful heart, a vibrant soul, a boat load of kindness and a stable head on their shoulders. Whether the CEO of their own huge company or a stay at home mom, (both jobs are tough as hell)- socio-economic status does not matter to me. WHO you are and how you treat others is important, not what you do for a living. Have patience- I know it sucks. Some great guys out there are doing their best to prioritize family obligations (if they are single with kids/dependants), careers and helping others and are not in the dating scene yet. The good ones are worth the wait... "

What''''s in the heart and mind matter more to me than the outsides. Outsides change, but if you are good on the inside, you are always going to be good. Just Saying. Single early 50''s female Who has her life together and my priorities straight.  
 
Edited by NameHere, 2016-11-18 05:21:35