Discussions

You might live in Brandon, Manitoba.  
If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through  
18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by,  
 
You might live in Brandon, Manitoba.  
If you're proud that your province makes the National news 96 nights each year because it is the coldest spot North America,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too spendy",  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you can’t stand people who leave their shopping carts all over the Parking Lot,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you sell your house within two days of listing it,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you buy your ‘Gourmet Food’ at the Tiger Store,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you’re local Dairy Queen is closed from October through March,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you wait two years for a Knee replacement operation,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If city council thinks its Ok to pay $96 for a Taxi to drive you to the  
next Town to Board a VIA passenger Train,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you attended an Agricultural Show, and you don’t farm,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have worn shorts and a Parka at the same time,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If your city has an equal number of Bars and Churches,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you know how to find....Wapiti Way, Neepawa Drive, and Aagaard Ave,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have to phone Winnipeg for an appointment to get your damaged car assessed,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you appoint members to a Board to operate the most major Agricultural facility in Manitoba, and they try to sell it off in small Lots.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If the Editor of the Daily Print says in an Editorial ‘there are no Homeless People” because his paper has not found a story on them’,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you think that ketchup is a condiment,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you cannot see the sense in unpacking your car, because you’re just going camping again on the next weekend,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you feed your kids cold Pizza for breakfast, and they like it,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you know a Guy who fell off his roof while removing snow,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If there is Handicap Parking in front of the Sports Plex,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If the only home delivery cooked food available is Pizza,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you think a fashion statement is wearing His and Her Snowmobile suits,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you brag about earning $1 an hour more than minimum wage,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If every day you receive handfuls of Flyers in your Mail Box,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If a vacation means going "up north" for the weekend,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you are willing to stand in line for 45 minutes in sub-zero temperatures to eat some foreign food at an event called “Winter Fest”.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you measure the distance to Winnipeg in hours,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you belong to the Brandon Paranormal Research Society, but cannot find a Rodent called “Brandon Bob”.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you instinctively walk like a Penguin for five months of the year,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have got too drunk to continue Ice Fishing,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you know several people, who have hit deer more than once,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you often switch from "Heat" to "A/C" in the same day, and back again,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you bait a Mouse trap with Peanut Butter instead of Cheese,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you can drive 100 Kmh through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you see Stakes advertised for $1.50 each at the Super Store, but at the Check Out they are 2.99 each, or buy one, and get the second for 1 cent.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you use the trunk of your car as a freezer,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If the largest traffic jam of the week is after a WHL Junior Hockey game,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If the Bus driver does not call out the Bus stop destinations because over 75% of the ridership cannot speak either of Canada’s Official Languages, LOL.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you blame your last accident of on the Senior Citizen you just hit,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you will not visit a Doctor whose office plants have died,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have great patience, 4 years to finish twinning the Trans Canada Highway, four years to complete one side of the Thompson bridge, fifteen years to build a new Fire Hall, probably the same for the Police Station, thirty years before the Corral Centre was built, and for ever, for a regular commuter service from Brandon Airport,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you know how to spell “Pierogi” and know what to do with one.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you see people wearing hunting clothes, and coveralls at social events,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you install security lights on your house, and garage, but leave the doors unlocked,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have a Canadian Soldier living on your Block.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you carry jumper cables in your car, and your girlfriend knows how to use them,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you happily volunteer to help improve life in Brandon Manitoba,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If your bedroom has three temperatures:  
1. Cold.  
2. Very cold, and  
3. Don’t fall out of bed Jack, or you’ll smash your Pyjama’s.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have ever been stuck in a traffic jam due to a John Deere tractor,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If the Mail Person leaves a card in your Mail Box telling you that the Parcel you are waiting for will be delivered to your Local Postal Outlet in seven days.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you are invited to a “Smoker’ and you are expected to go “Stag”,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If there are more people at work on the day of Christmas Eve than on the Deer/Goose Season Opener,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If there are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at any given time,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a Snowsuit,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If there are as many Hairdressing shops as Pizza Restaurants,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have met all the local Radio, and T.V. personalities,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you wait till the last day to buy your entertainment tickets, and get upset when the Show gets cancelled,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If parking your car for the night involves using an extension cord,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you attend an outdoor Poker game when it’s -25 Degrees C,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If all the lawns, and green space are covered with Dandelions,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have received a Ticket for parking near the University for over 2 hours, and 1 minute,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If the first post you read each day is Sandy’s Daily Affirmation,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you save Canadian Tire money,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you’re Grandfather wears a Toque,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you park outside the General Hospital to buy a Tim Horton’s double, double,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and of course, road construction,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If your idea of creative landscaping is a plastic deer next to your Blue Spruce,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you think a local Hotel Search Light shines in your bedroom window,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you Brag about its summer floral arrangements, and then Bitch about driving around the Watering Truck.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you have holidayed in Cuba because it’s cheap, and has no Americans,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you cannot ride the Bike Path past the Jewish Cemetery because there isn’t one,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you can translate the French for “Free’, “Prize”, and “no sugar added”, thanks to your extensive exposure to bilingual cereal packaging.  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If the Snow Clearing contractors use teams of men using leaf blowers,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If people protest against spraying mosquitoes to prevent the spread of West Nile Virus,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If after posting on this Community Web Site, members write you saying, “you don’t know what you are talking about”, or “why do you cut, and paste everything?” And my favourite “why don’t you know how to spell propperley?”  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If your family vehicle is a Mini-Van...  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you can get into Clancy’s Eatery & Drinkery without fumbling to open their Irish front door,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you take your portable TV on your camping trip so you don’t miss NHL hockey,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If finding you’re misplaced car keys involves looking in the ignition,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you know that “Cruising the Dub” does not involve watercraft on the River,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If "Down South" to you means Minot ND,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you know "a Brat" is something you eat,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you find a rack on a big game animal at the Big Buck Night is just as attractive as one on a female,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you put more miles on your snow blower during the winter, than your car,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you use your Credit Card towards your Retirement Savings Plan,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you can recognise the smell of a Semi full of Pigs,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you find -10 Degrees C "a little cool",  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you counted how many of these reasons were above,  
 
You might live in Brandon Manitoba.  
If you actually understand these jokes,  
 
Everyone really SHOULD live in Brandon Manitoba.