Discussions

Unless there is a really good reason...I don't think that it is appropriate not to attend the ceremony and then go to the supper and dance. What does everyone else think?? Perhaps I am out of touch but to me the ceremony is the most important part.

The ceremony is the most important part, for it's the wedding itself. I've never gone to only the celebration after. I have, however, been invited to a wedding (bought a dress to wear, nice gift card for The Keg, new shoes) and afterwards told by the family after the ceremony that they were about to have the supper and I had to leave but to return for the dance! Nowhere on the invite did it say that, plus it's a tacky thing to do to a guest. I took the gift card out of the envelope and had a better dinner at The Keg than the guests who were good enough to stay for supper.

I went to a wedding last weekend. It was at 2:00 in the afternoon, with cocktails and supper not until five. Many of the men that live an hour away were harvesting and did not come to the ceremony but came to the supper.  
 
Harvesting is one very good reason. They would have lost an hour driving time and 3 more hours between the wedding and cocktails.  
 
I am sure there are some that don't attend when the wedding is that early in the day, with not very good excuses. Although, not really considerate to the bride and groom, they have counted them in for the supper numbers.

Sassenach said "The ceremony is the most important part, for it's the wedding itself. I've never gone to only the celebration after. I have, however, been invited to a wedding (bought a dress to wear, nice gift card for The Keg, new shoes) and afterwards told by the family after the ceremony that they were about to have the supper and I had to leave but to return for the dance! Nowhere on the invite did it say that, plus it's a tacky thing to do to a guest. I took the gift card out of the envelope and had a better dinner at The Keg than the guests who were good enough to stay for supper. "

I''m guessing from the your user name that you are English.  
It comes as a big surprise to us British to be invited to a wedding, then have to go away while the meal takes place then return at night for the reception.  
In Britain, if you are asked to the wedding, you usually always stay for the meal and reception unless you have good reason to leave.  
You can also simply be asked to the reception on its own.  
When replying to the invitation, you normally make it clear which parts you are actually going to be able to attend.  
 
Edited by MREJ, 2016-09-09 19:00:42